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"substantial revision" is correct and usable in written English.
It is usually used to suggest that a lot of work needs to be done to correct or update something. For example, "This paper requires substantial revision before it can be accepted for publishing."
Exact(60)
This second edition includes substantial revision and new material.
It amounted to a substantial revision of the roots of conservative resistance.
She asked me for a substantial revision of the novel's third part.
"We saw a need for a substantial revision of the transaction," DnB's chairman, Jannik Lindbaek, said.
This is an area where we anticipate substantial revision in the near future.
"As a consequence, the bill is deeply flawed and will need substantial revision.
2018b, Explanation in mathematics, Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, substantial revision of 2011b.
the DMCA needs substantial revision and redirection -- i hope this case contributes to that end.
2017f, 'Style' in mathematics, Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, substantial revision of 2009c.
In a process like this, it is common for a proposal to undergo substantial revision after the architect is chosen.
The company will restate earnings for the year ended April 30, with a "substantial" revision in the fourth quarter.
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Since I tried Ludwig back in 2017, I have been constantly using it in both editing and translation. Ever since, I suggest it to my translators at ProSciEditing.

Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com