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Earlier last year, this same assistant principal observed me and instructed me to prioritize improving my "assertive voice" in the classroom.
"It made me feel at least that it was my assertive act, that I was the one making the decision, saying, 'Your conditions are so onerous and offensive, and to my mind flies so much in the face of what I would consider as good medical practice, that I don't want to be part of your club'," he says.
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"Sometimes my being assertive and speaking truth to power become reduced to controversial and defiant," he said, adding later, "I raise contradictions when I feel people who have suffered cause suffering to other people".
He said this loudly, within earshot of others, who just felt embarrassed for me because of my overly assertive style.
Hard to believe, I know, my not being assertive, but it is also universal that when the stakes are highest, people revert to more primitive and protective behaviors.
I could have had more impact on my previous teams if I had been more assertive with my opinions, but it's easy to worry about saying the wrong thing when you're relatively new.
I wish I could say I learned the lesson about the necessity for patients to be assertive from my career as a hospital CEO, but I actually learned it from my wife, Elizabeth, the day she gave birth to our first daughter.
Its bitter flavor is entirely traditional but too assertive for my taste.
You gave us sharp, memorable descriptions: "ammonia overtones reminiscent of the lobster you sent back" and "all the delicacy of a Prussian drill sergeant" and "confused yet assertive like my uncle Paddy in a cocktail dress".
I wish we had been more assertive with my brother about getting the help he needed so desperately.
If only I had been more assertive with my OB, asked more questions, demanded proof of Stacy's growth.
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Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com