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He warned everyone about the sequester so get off his lawn with your damned complaints.
Flatten your lawn with your feet or a roller.
Go over your lawn with your trusty lawnmower, on a lower-than-usual setting.
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A mulching mower will add the grass back to your yard as mulch (not thatch), which will provide your lawn with 40% of its fertilization needs.
As you read this article, nestled snugly in your sofa with a nice cup of tea or lying on your lawn with a Pimm's and a croissant, I'll be hard at work, striving to maintain what is arguably the most ambitious world record attempt in history.
This gun sends huge arcs of blazing hot plasma to your targets, ensuring that you can light light bulbs and scare cats off your lawn with absolute precision.
If you look closely, eelgrass resembles the grass from your lawn, with long flat blades, shallow roots and flowers.
Just cover part of your lawn with about two inches of newspaper topped with two inches of wood chips, and forget about it for six to eight months.
The best way to water your lawn with an inch of water is to soak it just once a week, which may take several hours depending on your water pressure and sprinkler heads.
Now the Knicks go back to Miami, a team that they view (and are viewed in return) with the ardor reserved for a neighbor who keeps running over your lawn with his truck.
(Some of these sites require you to upload one picture at a time, which is like mowing your lawn with toenail clippers. Therefore, my original wish list also included, "Must offer a mass-uploading program".
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Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com