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Do I get more attention if I announce before other guys or after?
And he has swatted away inquiries about his own finances, even though he said Wednesday that he would release his records "almost simultaneously of when I announce, if I announce".
"If I announce this morning that I'm a blue trolleybus, does it mean I should drive off to the depot?" he added, in an absurdist afterthought that might have appealed to the writer himself.
If I announce that I'm not going to be around for a few days, they all act as though I am about to air-drop them in Antarctica with only a couple of Kit Kats for sustenance.
"Why did you announce your retirement the day before the final and not the day after?" The reply: "Because I think tomorrow's press is going to be about the team, and if I announce it tonight, then tomorrow's press wouldn't have been about the team.
If I announce something i'm making sure I'm doing it.
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"If I announced the second coming of Christ, they would vote against it," he said.
I probably imagined what response I might get in my home town if I announced that I was headed to Bayreuth!
"If I announced I was the new Michael Jordan, the press would have said that's cool 'cause we allowed to bounce a basketball," he said recently at Greater New Hope Baptist Church in Washington.
If I announced, "My mother just died!" he would no doubt be cluckingly sympathetic.
On the way to the emergency room, I announced that if this one didn't stick, we'd take a trip and get a dog.
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CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com