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Still, why had he dumped me?
"Then he dumped me when I was 17 and married someone else and we didn't see each other for 54 years.
"But I didn't want to upset him too much," she says, "in case he dumped me out on the M4 again".
Our relationship continued until I was in my late teens, when I started going to a mixed sixth form and I cheated on my Habbo Hotel boyfriend, then he dumped me.
The funniest joke I've ever heard Louis CK's "Why" bit is gold, but for a simple joke, Sarah Silverman's "I once dated a guy who was half-black but he dumped me because I'm such a loser.
He grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, and said something like: 'Come on, Mrs John'" – at protests, guards usually learn to recognise her pretty quickly – "'you don't want to be ridiculous.' And I said: 'I do want to be ridiculous.' He dumped me outside the base, and I ran straight back in.
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In doing so, we perpetuate it, give it strength, and keep it alive ("I can't keep a date. At first everything's fine - he's sexy, and tells me things no guy has ever told me, and then he dumps me").
Two weeks later he dumps me.
What if I show vulnerability and he dumps me?
When his mother learned I was white, she insisted he dump me immediately.
"I came close, but she dumped me," he says.
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Since I tried Ludwig back in 2017, I have been constantly using it in both editing and translation. Ever since, I suggest it to my translators at ProSciEditing.

Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com