He practices heroic restraint and delicacy, given the five main characters he's been handed: one's blind, one's autistic, one's mute, one has early-onset dementia and one's a healthy, bitter drunk.
This is Burfict's first suspension, but he's been handed numerous fines over the past three seasons.
"He's been hand-squeezing cranberries all afternoon," a waiter announced one night, referring to Shinya Yamao, the bartender, who had created a cocktail special made with Crémant de Bourgogne, a sparkling wine.
And he's been handed a rumoured $80m to blow on it.
But I also think that he's been handed the tiller just as the ship went into the rapids.
He's been handed the nuclear codes, which he assumes will require some kind of retinal scan or fingerprint recognition.
This makes Nadella's challenge all the more profound: he cannot merely finish constructing the world for which he's been handed the blueprints; instead, he must begin to imagine a wholly new one.
It's easy to see why this matters: everyman hero stories teach every boy that he can make himself great through his own actions, regardless of how dull or difficult the lot in life he's been handed.
The shadow health secretary, Andy Burnham, said: "It will be utterly galling for nurses who've just had a pay cut from David Cameron to see he's been handing out cheques like confetti to people who have now been rehired.
With over 2.4 million followers on Twitter, that's more than any other UFC athletes on the current roster, and whilst his fellow fighters may complain of how he's been handed a spot on the roster, they should really be happy about the extra attention he will bring as a result of his presence.
He explains that he's been hand-painting and splattering his designs lately in an attempt "to discover the place where gritty meets pretty".
