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You host parties, bitch about your enemies - winning points if your friends think you're acerbic enough, grovel by offering gifts and seek introductions to powerful players.
Mercifully, the computer frees me from having to grovel by phone, just as caller ID makes it possible to screen out those individuals whom I suspect of trying to hit me up for their own causes.
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"Tom Paternoster has the best idea seeing as I know her," he says, "but it's not worked so I've resorted to grovelling by sms instead".
He made his money not by grovelling, but by selling copies of the woodcuts and engravings printed, since 1495, at his workshop in the centre of Nuremberg.
After commissioning memorials to Prince Albert and sulking, the real Queen Victoria's favourite pastime was being grovelled to by thankful peasants.
A piece of grovelling flattery by Sir Walter Raleigh to Good Queen Bess has been revealed again, centuries after it was painted out of his portrait.
In a way, it is uplifting to see South Africa's new black millionaires flashing their Rolex watches and being grovelled to by managers of the very restaurants that used to exclude them.
Initially greeted with grovelling praise by the annelids who masquerade as film critics at most US newspapers and magazines, Borat is now slowly starting to get a closer examination.
That thought came to mind last week when Newt Gingrich took the Republican competition to grovel for Jewish votes — by outloving Israel — to a new low by suggesting that the Palestinians are an "invented" people and not a real nation entitled to a state.
It is dangerous, regressive legislation molded around the idea that gay people still have to grovel for our rights crumb by crumb.
This is regarded as the great vindication of every young girl's fantasy – to get to be a queen by grovelling in a future king's bed!
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Since I tried Ludwig back in 2017, I have been constantly using it in both editing and translation. Ever since, I suggest it to my translators at ProSciEditing.

Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com