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A 'golf' set piece has one audience member trying to thwack a table tennis ball, with a plastic putter, into a hole fashioned from a dustpan, suspended in mid-air by another audience member.
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While New Yorkers pay lip service to the romance of retro, paying $7 for an order of mashed potatoes in a restaurant, or $95 for a dustpan from Williams-Sonoma, Heloise -- for better or worse -- is retro incarnate.
We lured the children with lessons in "practical life skills": We taught them to wash their hands, set the table, pour from pitchers and sweep into a dustpan --little exercisensualsensuawarenessess that focused their concentration.
A few years later, during the addition of a major new wing to the house, my father added a second secret cellar here, replacing the bricks with a faux-brick door; the keyhole was concealed behind a dustpan hanging from a peg.
It was basically like fate tapping us on the shoulder and being like, "Um, hey guys, Gross Jar?" Stirred from our funk by word of these veiny little pennies from heaven, we clambered downstairs with a dustpan to scoop them up.
A dustpan.
It was just a dustpan and brush.
A dustpan that I cut for the legs.
Trying to herd it into a dustpan is either an act of hubris or a clown routine.
A new model, the Swiffer Sweep + Vac, does the job of both a dust mop and a dustpan and broom.
Then you enter a dust bowl, land so flat it's more like a dustpan — so flat, in fact, that in 2003 researchers discovered that the entire state is flatter than an actual pancake, which the team purchased from one of the IHOPs that dot the landscape.
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Justyna Jupowicz-Kozak
CEO of Professional Science Editing for Scientists @ prosciediting.com