Actually, it can't do poached eggs, but let's not split hairs when a fabulous new opportunity is staring us in the face.
Its flamboyant facade divides opinion (it looks like an enormous present wrapped in gold Christmas paper) but the view over the city from the rooftop is fabulous.
The first breakthrough in this quest was the discovery that gold utensils, as well as looking fabulous, are inert and so do not interfere with the flavour of food or drink.
They feel they need fabulous new rooms – and enough of them to go round – if they are to pull in students.
Places that treated me as a friend include Vivenda dos Palhaços (£55 per room, vivendagoa.com) in Majorda, Goa, and interior designer David Carter's fabulous 40 Winks (single room £90, 40winks.org) in London, where you get treated to gossip in the garden over G&Ts.
It has been a "fabulous 2014", he said.
It is impossible to count how many variations of the "new year drop" there are around the world, but none are quite as fabulous as Key West's Red Shoe Drop, during which a drag queen named Sushi is lowered to the ground from inside a gigantic high-heeled strutter.
But much of the transformation of the Queen's image, from the chilly, notoriously philistinic matriarch who couldn't care less about Diana to an ever more droll and sympathetic mentor to pitifully grateful prime ministers is surely attributable to Mirren's superb acting, and to the writers who have increasingly depicted the monarch as – so long as you are not Margaret Thatcher – fabulous company.
It's fabulous for us to get this windfall.
Headlong's fabulous, terrifying staging of 1984 returns to the Playhouse, London for a limited run.
That was one of the treats I got myself – I just wanted a fabulous piano.
