"evening fell" is correct and usable in written English.
You can use it to describe the moment when night begins to come. For example: "As the sun began to set, evening fell swiftly over the town."
As evening fell, a cascade of storefront lights beckoned along the boulevard.
When evening fell in this sheltered spot, we had our final alfresco dinner.
When evening fell, we dined in cave restaurants, and that night many of us slept in cave rooms.
As evening fell, workers used flashlights to try to identify the dead.
When evening fell, we knew Buenos Aires far better than we knew one another.
Only when he had made that point clear to the warders, as evening fell, did he walk away.
As evening fell on June 6, the 6th Airborne was generally in place and had achieved its objectives.
As evening fell, police said the protests had been quelled, but there were unconfirmed reports of more gunfire.
As evening fell, she strung a bright halogen lamp to a tree outside her balcony, to help the rescue efforts.
At a news conference as evening fell, senior Hamas official Khalil al-Hayaa said the protests would continue.
As evening fell we bade goodbye to the Troy director and, having missed the mini-bus, hitchhiked back to town.
