* Blokes talk about blokes' stuff: music, football, beer, women, politics, technology.
"The biggest problem you have these days is you have young girls, that are dressed up ie miniskirts, stuff like that, they're going into the clubs and they're ending up going with blokes, stuff like that, and they're waking up the next morning and they scream rape," he claimed in a Channel 4 News interview in 2014.
See, still blokes saying stuff, but good stuff.
By about 2004, you would have people going past in cars — always blokes —shouting out stuff like POOFS!
Coming up: Ricky Gervais (who has been shoved into the graveyard slot in favour of Corden, which must be a bit gutting), something that looks very unfunny with Robbie Williams, the pub landlord bloke, and some other stuff that was too rude or too crap to show earlier in the evening.
I always try to think up stuff that blokes might fancy having a go at, but I must admit to getting carried away with knitted clutch bags and decoupage high heels over the last few months.
Super stuff from a bloke aged just 20.
The de rigeur uniform of the day for women, meanwhile, is cut-off jeans (or, preferably, faux leather shorts) with halter necks, and when the crowd cameras focus in on the audience – which they do relentlessly on the main (Future Music) stage – it is invariably to rest upon yet another girl shaking her stuff on her bloke's shoulders.
If you're cooking steaks to get your protein fix and are repeatedly triggering the alarm… switch to soy cheese, or that powdered stuff with topless blokes on the front.
Among her more vividly described obsessions and preoccupations are a famous stage actor, her menstrual cycle and a creepy bloke called Peter who keeps nicking stuff from her.
